My Learnings…. My Transformations

A Leader Must Be Loyal to the Chair

People love promotions and all the frills that come with it.  They invariably tend to see it as a status, least realizing that it is a responsibility.

When my mother asked me to take over the mantle from her, I was reluctant, as my son was just two years old. I was not sure if I could give so much time to my work. But nevertheless, I joined school. I told my mother that I would do all the work behind the scene, and help her in all ways, but I did not want any designation, as that would mean a lot more commitment.

Fast forward, fast forward, today I have completed almost three decades in my profession.

I have always seen my position as Principal and Correspondent as a huge responsibility of empowering thousands of students and hundreds of staff,  creating a great culture,  providing a positive environment,  designing a holistic curriculum, developing life-skills, values and character traits, building self-awareness and confidence, inculcating gratitude and selflessness, fostering responsible citizenship, integrating spirituality with education,  and most importantly, to treat everyone equally, without any bias.

“Nothing motivates a team

More than seeing their leader

Putting in a day’s honest work” - mahatria

I always wished to be a leader who walked her talk. I resolved to first be worthy of the chair, and I started working on myself. I began to inculcate the qualities that a leader must have.

I am still work in progress…

Unless we detach ourselves from the status, we cannot think rationally.

A leader has to be objective and see everyone on par and treat them with respect and dignity. Also, to improve the overall performance of the organization, mediocrity should not be tolerated, as it affects the development of both, the individual, and also the organization.

Our likes and dislikes do not have any place here. Let’s not have a personal agenda.

“A leader must be loyal to the chair.”

A wrong is a wrong, no matter who commits it. We need to correct the action of the person and not condemn the person.

Also, appreciating good work builds a progressive organization. A leader has to achieve that fine balance.

Emotional equanimity and maturity are two important qualities a leader must possess.

It is so easy to get carried away by all the frills that come with the post. But, staying grounded is an effort.

In the kingdom of God, your labels don’t work.

So long as you understand it is not a status, you will not look down at anyone as a subordinate, rather, you will see everyone as a member of your team.

Nobody should receive any personal favors from you as your loyalty is first to the chair.

Exponential growth of the organization should be your single - minded focus.

Have this clarity and develop the maturity before you assume the role of a leader.

Do you agree with me? What is your leadership style? Please share.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting
 

My Learnings….My Transformations

In the sway of emotions…

Man is a creature of emotions. Some of us are controlled by our emotions, while some of us are in control of our emotions. If we allow our emotions to control us, we will go through turmoil in life.

As mahatria says, “In the sway of emotions intelligence does not work. Hence, abstain from action and decision making in an emotional environment.”

Children back answer parents when they are angry, the husband shouts at the wife or vise-versa, when there is a disagreement, you also see angry outbursts in a traffic jam, parents use foul language when the security asks them not to park the vehicle in front of the school gate, and many such instances, that leave you wondering whether education makes any difference to the behavior of people.

Collecting a lot of information is called knowledge. Implementing that knowledge will lead to transformation.

When you get angry, just refrain from talking, if you cannot talk sensibly. You will be hurting others, or spoiling relationships or provoking others to retaliate. You cannot be rational in your thinking when you are angry.

This is a very big lesson that I learnt and it has helped me in many situations to remain cool. Of course, I have gradually grown into that state. I have understood the futility of losing my temper and screaming my head off as it will affect my body. Acid is secreted in your body when you get angry. Letting out words in anger without any control is called licentiousness, a behavior that is uncontrolled and socially unacceptable.

We invariably get angry only with those with whom we think we can get away with, right? Think about it. We will not get angry with our boss, as we may lose our job, or our landlord, who may chuck us out. Value every relationship.

Let us add fragrance to our environment and not move around like a garbage vehicle, that people wish to avoid. Next time someone provokes you, either leave the place or smile, or don’t react.

Work on it and one day you will be surprised to see your transformation. When so much good can come out of you, why bring out negativity. Not having the last word helps you win over your temper. And you will begin to look up to yourself.

It is great freedom when you outgrow your anger. It gives peace of mind not only to you, but to all those around you as well.

I would always like to be known for my grace and dignity and never be remembered for my foul temper and disgusting behavior. What about you?

Let me hear from you soon about your transformation. Begin today. Don’t postpone.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting
 

My learnings….My Transformations

 

Leading by example…

My spiritual guru who lives by His teachings, is a great example and an inspiration for all of us to live life worthy of the teacher. He keeps giving and giving and does not expect anything in return from us. All that He expects is that we show the world how to live life, by living an exemplary life. Don’t we owe this to the next generation?

Can our life be a Gita, or a Bible, or a Koran to the younger generation? As parents and teachers, we can build a better world by providing a better environment for our children.

There were so many role models in the generation before ours, whom we could emulate. Closer home, children should have someone to look up to. Then we are living a worthy life, in terms of values, habits, character, personal ethics and professional success. Are you leading by example? I learnt to bring devotion to my work and have unshakeable faith in the Almighty, from my mother.

As a child, I didn’t have any worthwhile qualities to boast of. But my spiritual growth helped me to channelize my stubborn nature to determination, perseverance and willpower. This made it easy for me to adopt a change in my habits and behavior. Sitting in meditation everyday has only aided in my overall growth and I began to magnetize positivity. Today, my past looks like someone else’s past.

What are children learning from us?

I asked this question three decades ago, when I first entered school. And I kept working on these aspects every day to get myself right. I am still work in progress. Children should be able to see adults who are right. They should not catch you on the wrong foot.

Integrity, responsibility, maturity, are all qualities that are caught and not taught.

Transitions are never comfortable…

Transitioning from who you have been to who you can become is never easy.

But, you are only a decision away. Just as how we have several falls before we learn to balance in a bicycle, we will have testing times during our transition. It may be painful for some, just like a little baby that is teething.

Children go through several transitions in their growing up years.

From a toddler to a school-going child, from a tween to a teenager, to a young adult, everything is a transition.

As parents and teachers, we need to make it seamless for them. Puberty is a very difficult phase in their life. Hormonal imbalances make life tough. They go through an emotional roller-coaster. Are we aggravating it or making it easy for them to handle?

Whenever you wish to go higher and reach a new comfort zone, you have to undergo painful transitions. From a homemaker to becoming a professional, achieving work life balance, becoming disciplined and mindful, growing into a selfless person, embracing change, having a daily routine, bringing lifestyle modification, everything was a period of transition for me. But I embraced it with pleasure as I knew that my growth will impact thousands of lives.

Are you struggling to exercise every day or eat what is good for your body?

-Love your body more and you will not do anything to harm it.

Do you easily get angry?

-Value peace and harmony and you will control yourself

Do you keep complaining?

-Use your words for a positive impact

Are you unable to sit in meditation for eleven minutes?

-Understand that it is the master key to all solutions in life.

Let go of all that is limiting your growth and happiness, and let in everything that makes you the most cherished person in all relationships.

Trust me, it is worth it!!!

Do take time to share your transitions with me.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

My Learnings…..My Transformations

 

C.D.S.I.E

Discipline was not part of my life in my childhood. Hence, bringing a routine into my life was a huge struggle. I just could not get myself to do anything consistently. Be it waking up early in the morning, or having a fixed time to study or pursuing a sport. There was a lot of randomness in everything I did. Probably I was lazy and preferred to relax. Pleasure dominated my life and took over my growth.

“Transformation is your willingness to grow from your “comfort” zone to “growth” zone through uncomfortable transitions.” -  mahatria

My learnings did not transform my life overnight or in a fortnight. Yet, I patiently worked on myself by attaching intensely to the process. It has taken me years to reach where I am today. Absolutely disciplined!  

Motherhood brought the first transformation in me. I was willing to do anything for my child, even if I was inconvenienced. There was a disciplined routine to take care of him.

That was the beginning of a disciplined and selfless life. I was consistent in everything that I did for him. Never spared a day. I gave up all my pleasures to be with him and help him navigate through his academics and sports. Nothing else mattered to me, except his growth. No social life, no television or movies, and I didn’t miss any of these. Today, I am a proud mother, who is watching the beautiful life her son is living. It took years of consistent effort to give him that unwavering support.

The next was, my becoming an educationist. I had to ask myself what changes I had to bring in myself to be worthy of the chair I occupied. My inner engineering began. I am still working on myself. When you work for a larger Cause, the best in you manifests. Thus, the leader in me emerged!

 I realized that we are ready to give up something when our love for the other is more.

Change held long enough becomes transformation- transcending the old formation is transformation. A seed in a bottle still remains a seed. It will not germinate. It needs a fertile soil.

Only a prepared mind can receive the wisdom. Probably my mind was ready to receive when my spiritual journey began. When the student is ready the teacher appears. It was true of my life. I was ready to listen…

Every value that I was taught became a part of my life only through Consistent Directed Self-motivated Intelligent Effort. I have been consistently practicing meditation, yoga, weight training, as a life style modification. It has become my way of life.

I am also practicing gratitude, restraint, acceptance, and many such positive qualities that are making my life so peaceful. Faith and surrender have become my DNA.

Anything that is practiced every day becomes a habit. Make growth a habit.

 

I can confidently say…

Day by day

In every way

I am becoming

Most and more

Healthy, wealthy

Loving, blissful

Peaceful, spiritual.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

My Learnings……My Transformations

 

Choiceless state

In mythology it is said that Rama was a choiceless state for Hanuman. He refused to go to “Vaikuntam” as Rama would not be there in that form. There are certain things in life which we can choose not to do, but there are certain things that we must do, no matter what. Do you have any practices or a routine that you will adhere to and give yourself no other alternative? Well, Meditation, exercise, my annual spiritual retreat, Sunday morning “satsang,” writing a blog every week, eating healthy food, writing a gratitude journal every day, investing quality time with the family, reaching out to people in times of need, are all a choiceless state for me. Not reacting to negative actions, not retaliating to allegations, trusting humanity all over again after being betrayed, are all a choiceless state.

Do not give yourself an alternative choice for something that is good for you, which you have to do on a daily basis.

Sleep is something I still love. But waking up at 4.30am, doing yoga and meditating on a daily basis is helping me to contribute a lot more to the world and has made life so much more beautiful. Why would I give myself a choice to miss my daily routine even for a single day? I have made what is necessary, compulsory in my life.

Subordinate your likes and dislikes to the purpose of your life

Most of the children may be tempted to run towards their mobile or switch on the television or use their computers to play games as soon as they come back from school. It is their way of unwinding. There are some who will refrain from doing all of these as they would have prioritized to do what is most important.

I too have learnt to take up that which is important, whether I like it or not, as I know that my likes and dislikes cannot come in the way of achieving my goal. Individual interest has to be sacrificed for larger interest. Over the years, putting others ahead of me comes naturally to me. Today I don’t feel I am sacrificing my sleep or giving up my comfort zone, or not going out with my friends, because of my work. Rather I am enjoying what I am doing, and happy that I am making my life count. I am not missing any of these.

In order to achieve growth in professional and personal life, to be healthy, to contribute to the world, to become a champion, we need to prioritize and let go of the trivial pleasures of life that will take us nowhere.

As mahatria says, “What is most important should not be at the mercy of what is least important.”

Start loving what is good for you. You will find yourself indulging in it more often.

Do it consistently and you will find yourself doing what is right.

Then you will begin to look up to yourself. That will be the beginning of a life of purpose, and you will attain a choiceless state

What are your ways of attaining a choiceless state? I would love to hear your thoughts on these. 

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting