PURSUIT OF HAPPINESS

 

“Happiness in all the small things

                Success in the big things” – mahatria Ra

       

All of us congregated at a place for the annual convention, where people of the Path from all over the world, get to meet and greet each other. It is like a festival. There is a lot of camaraderie, dance, music, food, and most importantly, loving togetherness. The day begins very early, with loud drum beats, clanging of the cymbals, a lot of screaming, laughter and dancing. Most of us are adults, with a small percentage of children, who also join the fun with high energy levels. We are from different backgrounds. Each one is an Achiever and an inspiration. Yet, there is a oneness amongst us. We look forward to this event, which brings us all together, and the vibes are unbeatable. When happy people come together, there is not only celebration, but absolute explosion. The air reverberates and pulsates with joy and happiness. The energy is palpable.  The feeling one experiences will last a lifetime. I am truly blessed to be a part of the fraternity.

 I am reminded of my childhood days, which was spent in the company of my cousins, both, maternal as well as paternal. We used to stay in each other’s house, went for movies together, laughed over silly things, fought with each other, ate together, slept on a mattress in the floor, sang songs, enacted plays, walked around the garden, chased butterflies, ran after dragon flies, walked towards the sunset, thinking we would reach the sun!  We used to climb trees, cycle around the place and visit our friends, and it did not make any difference to us. We felt at home everywhere.

 It was such a beautiful life, when nothing mattered to us because we lived in the present. It was sheer unalloyed joy. In short, we found happiness in the small things of life. They were costless luxuries!

 I don’t know if children these days enjoy such moments? Whether they do anything other than playing with gadgets? They are really missing out on all the beautiful moments of life. Like adults, I hear children saying, “I am so stressed.” What is so stressful about life for a child? I don’t understand. They have to take responsibility only for their life. They are stressed if they are told to study, or not to go out with their friends, or to put their mobile away, or not to use a powered two-wheeler. The little joys of life are missed out because they are either on social media most of the time, or playing video or computer games. Sitting together as a family and playing board games gives joy, helping your mother in whichever way you can, in household chores, is joy, guiding your sibling in studies is joy, indulging in a hobby gives joy, watching the night sky together as a family gives joy.

 Love yourself first. Learn to appreciate everything. Value yourself and be grateful for all the blessings in your life.

“There is no way to happiness; happiness is the way.” It is within you. But you are searching for it in the outside world. Do everything out of happiness and not for happiness. Happiness is in the small things of life. Keep smiling.

Even grown up adults wait for something to fall from heaven, so that they can celebrate. They wait for big things to happen, so that they can be happy. They are not even able to smile. Happiness seems to be a premium. Is happiness evading us, or are we avoiding happiness? There is happiness in putting your child to sleep, in cooking exclusive dishes for the family, in dressing up your child, in reading a bedtime story to your little one, in writing a letter to your loved one, in seeing your child dance, in listening to the babble of the new born, in keeping your house tidy, in just being with your family, in short, there is joy in every moment of life. Live in the present. Feel it, experience it!

There should be a dance in your heart and music in your soul. Work when you must work, but don’t miss out on the small joys of life.

We live only once. Let us not waste our lifetime in quarrels, disagreements, and discords. Happiness is always in the small things of life.

When it comes to work, keep empowering yourself, so that your competencies do not go unnoticed. Success comes only to those who unleash their potential. We tend to be satisfied with small achievements. Make it big professionally. Grow in such a way that one day all those who rejected you will admire you.  Go for the big hit. Aim for success in the big things of life. If you are satisfied with small successes, you will stagnate. Leave no stone unturned to reach the top. Become an inspiration for the people around you. Happiness is the key to success. Being happily successful is a beautiful combination!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

THREE THINGS I WILL NOT MISS

 

“Discipline enables you to be the Master of your time & thus do what’s important before it becomes urgent” – mahatria Ra

 For many of us, medicine has become our food, and food has become like medicine. Why is it so? We live in a world of excuses. I realized this when I started seeing so many people with health issues. Going to the doctor has become a way of life. With a sedentary lifestyle and wrong food habits, how can we avoid health issues?  People seldom embrace what is important Their typical answer is, “I don’t have time.” If I have to do something spontaneously, it should become a habit first. Only then I will not think twice before doing it. To develop a habit, we need to consistently practice it. The simple prescription is, to embrace what is right, and avoid what is wrong. We need a strong willpower to do it, even though it sounds simple. Begin with the end in mind. What is it that you want in life. Define it, and chalk out a plan.

 To be able to live a holistic life, I need to grow in all dimensions. So, I have to keep the student in me alive. Only then will I be able to learn and apply it in my life. I am glad that even at this age I am willing to learn. Else, I will be creating my own misery. What I have noticed is that, most of the times, the enemy is within us. We should be willing to change and adopt new practices if that will gift us a better life. You are never too old to do what is right. I learnt the new way to live my life past the age of forty. But I did not deprive myself the opportunity to try the new way, and I must say that life gifted me with holistic abundance. I never refused to accept what was told to me. It did take time, but today, I can say that, “Life is so complete.” I will not miss out on my happiness even if I have to take the tough path to achieve it.

If I want to live a life of quality, I need good health. Many suffer from aches and pains, but still will not do anything to alleviate the pain. All that they do is, swallow a pill. If I don’t take care of my health, I will have to live a wretched life. My movements will be restricted. I will have to be confined to a place. I have seen women running a marathon at the age of eighty, and doing several push-ups. And I also see youngsters who are addicted to the screen and will not move their body. Movement is very important to man. There are so many forms of exercises that we can do. We don’t need expensive equipment. Within the comforts of our own home we can do yoga, aerobics, Pilates, Zumba and so many other exercises. Why, our own body is our gym. I will never neglect my body. I invest time for my exercise. Though I love to sleep, I wake up early for my yoga class. After a long day’s work, I hit the gym in the evening. I will not give myself a choice to avoid exercising.

Having understood the right way to live, by avoiding all kinds of negativity, I must say that, even if there are disturbances in life, once in a way, I don’t stay disturbed. I have understood the futility of reacting to the world.  Someone else’s ugliness and immaturity should not affect me. It is a beautiful space to be in, when you can be the master of your emotions, rather than be a slave to it. What helped me to become the master of my emotions? My daily practice of sitting in meditation. If you can sit in silence for eleven minutes every day as a dinacharya, you will grow in self-awareness. It will be just a matter of time before you become a self-disciplined person and achieve emotional equanimity. You will start respecting yourself and feel good about the way you live your life. I will not miss my daily routine of meditation. It has helped me to respond, and not react. What are you waiting for? Wake up early, meditate and exercise. You will experience the greatest delight of your life. You will never say no to what is important. The bounties of life are always beyond the imaginary finishing line. Don’t miss it!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

MY PERSONAL PLANNER

 

Most of us are women in my work place. It is very characteristic of women to prioritize their family over themselves. From the time I began understanding the importance of staying fit and having a healthy lifestyle, I have been taking care of myself. It is definitely making all the difference. For the last fifteen years I have been creating time for what is important. I also know that the easiest thing to tell is, “Well, I don’t have time.” Who is the loser? If I tell that I don’t have time to take care of my body, I must be ready to embrace ill-health. “Health is wealth” makes sense to us only when we grow older. But by then we sometimes lose our health. The only time that we can get for ourselves is in the morning. Wake up half-an-hour early and do some form of exercise. The family demands will be more during the rest of the day, and for some of us, we will be in our work place.

 Meditating on a daily basis enables spiritual ascendance. If you can give eleven minutes of your time for your spiritual growth, it will create a lot of self-awareness in you. With this heightened awareness you can live a life of peace and harmony, which has become scarce now. People live life with an agitated and disturbed mind. Happiness has become a premium. People are not ready to sit still for just eleven minutes. Thoughts will keep coming when you sit in meditation, but continue to sit, and one day you will slip into Silence. Make it a habit and you will realize that all the bounties of life and the dynamism for your doing comes from your non-doing.  There are women who have made exercise and meditation a way of life.

 If we understand that the proper use of time will enable us to do what is most important, we will never be at the mercy of what is least important. There are so many people who are able to do this and that. There are children who are prompt in their work, who are achievers, not only in academics, but also in different other fields, like sports, performing arts, writing, painting, doodling, etc. When they can do it, we too should be able to do. Time is an attitude. As mahatria says, “Time management is not all about managing the clock, but it is about managing time in the context of what you want to be in the future.” Do you want to be healthy? Do you want be peaceful? Do you want to be successful? Do you desire holistic abundance in your life?

 “Where your time goes there your future comes”- mahatria Ra

 The Time Management Matrix has four quadrants.

Q1- Urgent and important- Zone of demand- Creates stress- Last minute preparation for the exam, meeting deadlines, crisis management, etc

Q2- Not urgent, but important- Zone of discipline- Creates value- Developing your capability, preparing a schedule for your daily routine, investing time on your physical and mental health, anything futuristic.

Q3- Urgent, but not important-Zone of drain-Creates frustration- Some unavoidable interruptions, meetings, pressing matters, etc.

Q4- Not urgent, not important- Zone of delusion- Creates waste-All kinds of time wasters, social media, television, gossip time, nothing that will bring your growth.

I hope you realize that Q3 & Q4 are your time stealers, that will lead to frustration and disappointment in life. You will ultimately become a loser in life. Anything unavoidable, that has to be attended to, on a short notice, does not happen every day. So, life should not be in Q1 by the delays you create. Ideally, life should be in Q2. A disciplined and a well-planned life, where you allot time for everything that is necessary and important, without giving any excuse to yourself, leave alone the world outside. Hey, I just brought that shift in my life, and that totally transformed everything about my life. I wish to see each one of you experiencing that joy, which only a disciplined life can give us. It is truly liberating. Is your daily planner ready?

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

THINK WIN-WIN

 

The expectant mother is always full of her child, whom she has not even seen. But the love she feels towards ‘it’ cannot be quantified. She is willing to give up anything that does not suit this unborn child. Such is her unconditional love. She will avoid the food that she likes the most, she will slow down, if she is asked not to do something that will affect the baby in the womb, so be it. Even if it is a lose-win situation, it brings sheer joy to the mother to do it for the little one. She is willing to go through pain to experience the pleasure of having the child.

 In a family, when both, the husband and wife are working, and if all the household chores and raising the children become the wife’s responsibility, it takes a toll on her. Physically and psychologically she is drained sometimes. It is a lose-win situation for her, and she does not cherish it. If the husband understands her predicament and comes forward to help her in sharing with her the household chores and the responsibility of the children, it will be a win-win situation.

 “Strong people don’t put others

  down…

  They lift them up”

 When children become teenagers, they go through hormonal changes. So, their behavior also tends to change. They are driven more by pleasure, and may not do what is right. This is a traumatic period for the parents as well. If we can build a relationship with them from childhood, we will not get ego involved with them. When ego comes in, everything else goes out. There is no love in the relationship. It is always, “I win, you lose.” As parents, we need to first understand that there is no question of winning against our own children. Every time our child loses, we also lose. By hurting our child’s feelings, by insulting them, by putting them down, by hurling abuses at them, by demotivating them, by comparing them with others, what are we trying to achieve?  It is a lose-lose situation and we also lose our children in the process. This is the child we waited for nine months to cuddle and smother with kisses. This is the child for whom we were ready to give up anything. This is the same child who was the apple of our eyes.

 The power of conversation and consistent parenting helps in building a strong relationship with our children. Involve children in simple day-to-day household responsibilities. Share with them the financial budget that you have made for the month. Need be, ask them to add their views, to reduce the expenses. Ask them ideas to save money. Probably they will feel like a responsible adult when we ask them for their opinion and involve them in matters of importance. This is one of the ways to make them feel important as well. Our relationship with them will improve. This will be a win-win situation.

Children need to be told that in life they should always think win-win in every situation and in every relationship. This will help them to develop empathy and seek mutual benefit. It is an attitude towards life, to find resolutions and to include negotiations in interactions. Everybody finds happiness in it.  If children experience this at home, then that would be the best way to develop the right mindset. Are we ready to win by helping others to win? Let us first begin at home, with our own children.

 “A win-win situation is not a compromise; it’s a collaboration where everyone wins”

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting