My Learnings…My Transformations

THE THREE KEY RELATIONSHIPS:

No matter what we achieve or where we reach in life, our happiness and peace depend on whether we get certain fundamentals right. Most importantly, whether we get the three relationships in our life right. My relationship with myself (intra- relationship), with others (inter-relationship) and with the divine (transcendental-relationship).

INTRAPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP:

 I cannot boast about a balanced childhood. I had my own areas of weaknesses and limitations. Especially my self-image, which was at its lowest ebb. My spiritual journey brought many corrections in me, one at a time. A lot of inner cleansing began to happen, and I was proud of the person that emerged from within. Getting my thoughts and actions right through years of practice, helped me to feel happy about the person I became. When you grow in your own eyes, you are able to look up to yourself. This instantly builds your self-image.

I learnt to drop guilt by forgiving myself. I stopped defining myself by my looks, as there was a huge scope for me to become a beautiful person, inside out. The focus shifted to that. I no more compared myself with anyone, as I began to feel complete unto myself. Thus, there was a huge shift in my relationship with myself, as I began accepting myself.

When you offer yourself to a higher intelligence to work on you, you can be sure that nothing but the best will come out of it. This has tremendously improved the quality of my life in such a way that life has become so beautiful.

INTERPERSONAL RELATIONSHIP:

The three powerful mantras which I learnt, a practical approach to navigating life’s challenges;

“Accept the unchangeable

Change the changeable

Remove yourself from the unacceptable” -mahatria

Accept the unchangeable:

This became the very basis of my relationship with the world. I was quite rigid in my relationships as I was unable to accept people who wronged me, and so I sometimes lost my peace. According to this mantra, one needs to accept certain situations or actions of people that are not in one’s area of influence, for one’s own peace. Resisting it could only cause suffering in us. Acceptance is the key to your peace and the proof of your maturity.  

“How others behave

Is not in my control.

How I choose to respond

To their behavior

Is in my control.” -mahatria

Change the changeable:

I attempted making positive changes wherever I had control, and thereby worked on improving relationships. Peace prevailed as there were no agitations in the mind.

Remove yourself from the unacceptable:

Whenever there are situations or relationships that are toxic or harmful, if it is unacceptable to you, it is better to remove yourself with grace from such a situation or relationship. I did just that. This, I think, is a practical approach to navigating life’s challenges.

TRANSCENDENTAL RELATIONSHIP:

I have been a believer of God from childhood. A quality I imbibed from my mother. But God was always a form, an altar, an idol, in the sanctum sanctorum, to whom I prayed from far. I was God-fearing.

With my initiation into spirituality, very soon I realized that God is formless. He is a divine presence in my life. He is not outside of me, but within me. That, when I pray to Him, I am communicating to Him, and when I am in silence, I am in communion with Him.

That my work could be a prayer unto Him. When I take care of His creations, He will take care of me. This understanding created a major shift in my perspective about God.

Are you struggling in any of these relationships? Try these mantras and you will experience the best of times in life!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting  

LEAVE BEHIND A LEGACY

“History is full of individuals, where one human being in one lifetime, by the way they lived their life, impacted humanity forever…That’s a teacher for humanity and for the future of the world.” -mahatria

Happiness is a state of mind. It does not depend on any external factor. If we decide to do something happily, that is what we will experience. Everything depends on how we perceive the world or the work we do.

Becoming a teacher is not a simple decision that one makes. But it is something that should be taken after much deliberation. It is a huge responsibility, as the future of students is shaped by a teacher. It is a silent promise that a teacher makes to the parents, that she will take care of the child.

Once we take it up, we have to gear up for all the challenges that come along with it, depending on the level we are handling. Challenges will come from students, parents, as well as colleagues.

In an age where there are several distractions, how does a teacher stay connected and committed? Many may think that teaching is the easiest thing to do. Become one and you will understand that it is easier to work with machines or numbers or data.

                 “To teach is to touch a life forever.”

 It calls for not just academic brilliance, but also a compassionate heart, mindfulness, a perennial source of love, emotional equanimity, personal values, patience, integrity, versatility, resourcefulness, prudence, and so much more, if you are a teacher. Students will remember their teachers much after they leave school for the way they made them feel in class.

Agreed that teaching is a very demanding profession, but are you willing to dedicate yourself to it? Then you are truly a blessing to the world.

It requires high energy levels to keep a class of forty engaged. A mother with two kids will agree how tough it is for her. A teacher should cater to the different intelligences in her class and also address the ones who have learning disabilities, like a juggler in the circus. It is indeed a tight rope walk.

There is a lot of preparation that is required to teach a generation that has vast exposure. The shelf life of knowledge and skills are changing. Today, in the age of AI, knowledge can be easily accessed. Without preparation, the class cannot be engaged. Students respect teachers who are knowledgeable.

If a generation that has a very short attention span has to be attentive for forty minutes, the teacher has to be very resourceful and make her class dynamic. When there is a huge temptation to relax at home, watching television serials and staying long on social media, it needs tremendous will power to set aside time for classroom preparation.

Prioritizing can alone help in resolving the inner conflict

We need to give up mediocrity to embrace excellence, without any compromise. No other profession demands an individual to be a role model as much as it is required of a teacher. Teaching is the mother of all professions.

Students will grow into wholesome individuals by just watching the qualities of the teacher. They will simply dissolve in their presence.

Teachers have to collectively own the vision of the school. It is expected of a teacher to be familiar with the latest trends in education, so that she can be relevant.

When a conflict in the mind to choose between what is easy and convenient or what is right, is resolved, a champion of a teacher emerges.

Schools are waiting to experience teachers who are sorted, who are ethical, who align to the school’s culture, who bring in expertise and excellence in execution, whose intentions are pure, who will mentor the students, making them knowledgeable and skillful, mold them as wholesome individuals, creating them as leaders of the future.

One life can impact one generation by the way we live our life. Let’s aspire to leave behind a beautiful legacy of an inspired and empowered community of students.

Individually as a teacher and collectively as a school, let us gift “inspirational” leaders and role models to make the world beautiful.”- mahatria

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting 
 

LOVE UNITES

 Every morning when I reach near the school I see a lot of traffic on the school road. Parents park their vehicles outside the school gate, some are in deep conversation with their child, some others give send off kisses to their kids, some keep waving to their children till they disappear into the school building. Though it causes a traffic jam in the area, it is heart-warming to see the bonding.

I always wonder why it disappears when children grow up? There is a strain in the relationship. Parents tend to get ego involved with children. This is visibly seen when they don’t turn up for the Parent-teacher meetings or school celebrations, or when the child gets into the wrong company and thus develops wrong habits. Building relationships is vital in the growing up years of a child.

As a working woman, I set my priorities right. I didn’t see anything more pleasurable beyond my work and my family. Only these two mattered to me. Coming back from work every evening and looking into the daily school work of my son, playing games with him, attending to his needs, sending him for sports and UCMAS classes, was all that I did on a daily basis, apart from going on family holidays, during his childhood.

I did not understand the game of football, basketball or tennis. I didn’t know the players either. But my son followed these games and so he would excitedly talk about the game and his favourite player as soon as I returned from work. I would just listen to him. That was enough for him.

Attachment to the family happens only when we connect with them in their growing up years by giving them the much required time and provide them the right environment.

When was the last time you engaged with your child in an activity? How often do you invest time with your child? Is there peace and harmony at home?

We tend to hold the honesty of a child against the child. This stops them from sharing anything with us. If we can stop quoting the mistakes of the child, they will feel free to share everything with us. Children will begin to trust us. I consciously made an effort not to hold to the past, and I became my son’s trusted friend.

I have understood the futility of getting ego involved with my child. The immaturity of the child should not spoil the relationship. Our maturity should prevail. I very well know that it is easier said than done. I am not a perfect mother either. But certain conscious decisions were made and practised consistently.

You win by allowing your child to win, especially in an argument. They may feel they are right. As mahatria says, “It is not the question of whose mistake, but it is the question of whose life. So, you make the U-turn.”

I prioritised love over ego. Hence, I made a resolve, not to retaliate or have angry outbursts at home. So, peace and harmony prevailed.

However angry we are, can we refrain from making derogatory remarks about our children? Are we defining them by their looks or by their marks? Is it fair to dent their self-image? It will affect them in a big way as they will lose their confidence and self-esteem.

Is that what we want for our children? Our maturity should prevail in every situation, no matter how naive or immature they are. Forgive them for their ignorance.

Never let your ego take away the beautiful relationship between you and your child, whom you nourished with care in your womb, whom you rocked to sleep in your arms, whom you fed and bathed with love, for whom you spent sleepless nights, whose smile and gurgle brightened your day, whose childhood memories you treasure, every milestone, the first word your child uttered, the first step, the first bite of solid food, the first day to school, and the days you waited for your child to return from school, the tight hug that you gave. Is it with this child that you have a disconnect?

The relationship with your child is too precious to allow anything to ruin it. Throw away your ego, your impatience, your anger and just embrace one vital quality called LOVE. Everything will dissolve into it. It helps in sinking all differences of opinion. May your love towards your child be unconditional. It is love that unites all hearts and brings happiness and peace!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting 

SCREEN ADDICTION

Education has undergone significant changes over the years, moving away from the traditional teacher-centered approach to more student-centered, technology integrated methods. It has become inevitable for students to use computers. Since some of them do not have a computer, they use their mobile to check their home-fun activities and assignments.

Nowadays, in some families, children are given a mobile from childhood, so that they don’t disturb their parents.

I have seen toddlers sitting with a mobile in shopping malls, with a grandparent to monitor. The parents are busy shopping. I have always felt that I should have carried a story book with me, which I could have given to the child.

With too many gadgets in our life, and with everyone having a mobile, the new toy has become an addiction for the young and old alike. Technology has to make our life easy, but instead it has made life complicated.

We do not expose our children to any hobby when they are young. Parents should start reading to them when they are still babies. This habit should continue when they are toddlers. Stories should be read out to them at bedtime. This should be a daily routine. The benefit of doing this will be seen when they pick up books and start reading.

Initiating them into reading or sports or any other hobby, will ensure that they are not glued to gadgets, but use technology only to gather information and for other academic purposes.

Movement and outdoor activities are very much required for children. They should be part of some sports. That will help them to be alert and energetic.

Technology aided education is used to enhance the teaching-learning process. Blended learning and flipped classroom combine traditional classroom instruction with online learning components. It deepens one’s learning in the classroom.

Children use computers for coding and various other experiments they do in a STEM lab. They also have computer education in school. Computers are used to enhance their learning. It is inevitable as the world has moved on to AI and we cannot work without computers.

If students are using their computer or the mobile to learn something or to store data, or for making a presentation, or for anything where learning happens, they are putting it to right use. These are valuable tools for learning and communication. Let it not become an addiction for the wrong reasons.

There are many activities into which children can be initiated into, after school hours. It will be more productive than sitting in front of the television or playing with gadgets.

Beware and be aware! Excessive use of technology can impact mental health, affect academic performance, bring deterioration in physical health and also lead to social isolation.

My sincere appeal to parents is, not to give a mobile to your child so that you can be free. For the rest of your life you will be struggling to wean your child away from it. Let us resolve to create a generation that will use technology resourcefully and productively. 

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting 
 

AN EDUCATION WITH A DIFFERENCE

 

The academic year begins with a bang with every school showcasing the results of the board exams, how many students qualified for NEET and IIT JEE, etc. Schools also showcase the number of students who have joined other professional courses. This adds to the brand value of the schools. Social media is flooded with these advertisements.

I began to examine the worthiness of providing an education which believes that marks alone define your success. What about a long life that children will lead after schooling? Are we preparing them to live a life that is ethical, moral, and spiritual?

No doubt every school gets recognized for achieving extraordinary results, but life is beyond marks. Is it not important to see what we leave within the child? How much of the culture and ethos of the school are the children carrying within them to live a successful, yet peaceful, happy and a value-based life?

I fully understand that the primary responsibility of every school is to focus on academics, and it is the primary responsibility of parents to instill values in children.

In today’s scenario, where both parents are working and everybody is busy meeting deadlines, we, as a school, take the responsibility, by integrating values, discipline and spirituality along with academics. Hence, the education we provide is truly holistic.

Activities are conducted and experiences are given to develop the values of gratitude, self-love, compassion, honesty, reverence for parents and teachers, to be a good finder, to be happy to help, preserving the environment, eating healthy, responsible citizenship, punctuality, willpower, social awareness and responsibility, to name a few, along with meditation.

Thus, it helps them to value everyone and everything.

No subject will teach children any of these values. It is to be integrated in the curriculum. Our school has more than sixty best practices, which contribute to the holistic growth of children. We also provide a conducive environment for the students.

When children go through these experiences from kindergarten to school final, there is bound to be a transformation in their thought process and aids in building a powerful subconscious mind.

Recently our students celebrated Doctor’s Day by visiting hospitals and presenting a hand-made greeting card and a sweet box for doctors. They expressed their gratitude for their selfless service. Needless to say, the doctors were overwhelmed by this unexpected visit by the students. It was an enriching experience for the students, one that created a lasting impression in their minds. The occasion helped them to understand the value of doctors.

These are ways in which we can build a beautiful world.

Great professionals with no values can cause severe damage to society. Physical, social, moral, emotional, ethical, and spiritual development will only create a wholesome personality. 

The primary and secondary formative years define a child’s adult life. The experiences that they go through during these crucial years will create the man or woman they turn out to be.

Let us not just train children to secure high marks in the exam, but also to make a mark in life!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting