WHO ARE YOU?

 

“What has gained mastery over you has gained mastery over your peace” – mahatria Ra

 It is human nature to love appreciation and appear good in front of the world. This is how we are in our childhood. There have been so many naughty moments in my life. Doing some mischief and then walking away as if I did nothing, with a straight face. Somehow, in childhood, it gave a kick. Were we not one person at home and another outside? We behaved so well in front of relatives and friends, though at home, we siblings fought tooth and nail with each other and back answered my mother. Very notorious at home, but very soft spoken amidst other people.

 As you grow older these pretenses fade away for some, whereas, some build a wall around themselves. They are very private people and will not allow anyone to peep into their personal life. I was more of an open person who did not think twice before speaking. That was my folly too because I made some daring comments. Today I wonder how I could make such blunt statements and get away with it. Absolutely immature, but happy that I was not manipulative. I was a brutally frank person who was not very sensitive to the feelings of others.

 I have come a long way and mellowed down a lot. In the current maturity, I don’t find the need to prove myself to anyone. I know who I am and I don’t have to convince the world, rather live my life aligned to the truth of life. I need to be spiritually aligned, which is a constant striving in me. I need to be more loving, do everything out of joy and happiness, preserve my integrity, be a selfless person, achieve emotional equanimity, be peaceful and radiate it in the world around, develop a grateful heart, magnetize holistic abundance into my life, perpetuate goodness, be useful to the world, and all of it that would enable me to live a holistic life.

 “Who you are when nobody is watching you is your character”-mahatria Ra

  Today, putting the world ahead of me, choosing what is right, devoting my life for a Cause, operating out of love and happiness, counting my blessings, taking care of my body, having a daily appointment with the divine, seeing my work as a prayer unto Him, not losing my peace, staying calm, having a strong faith in Him, strong leadership, all of these come naturally to me, without any effort. I don’t have an iota of doubt that the new me is a product of the spiritual connect. It is not enough that we gain a lot of insights from the teachings of our guru. Living by those teachings is what brings about that Transformation.

 The first stage is, we are not aware of our shortcomings. It is the stage of unconscious incompetence. Then we learn to consciously practice the teachings with a lot of effort. A state of conscious incompetence. Then we start practicing regularly. That is the third stage of conscious competence. Then we reach a stage where all this becomes a part of our life. We do it effortlessly. The stage of unconscious competence. It is at this stage that all these qualities merge into you and becomes your persona. A lot of internal shift happens within you. This is a very beautiful state to be in. I would love each one of you to experience this state of inner bliss. Wake up to the exciting possibilities in your life.  

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

TEMPLE OF TRANSFORMATION

 

Blossoming in the environment

Taking care of every requirement

A home away from home

Is how a school has to be

 

A teacher need not preach

But has to necessarily reach

Connecting with them in class

Then becomes an easy task

 

To love, they will truly respond

This will create a lovely bond

Happiness & joy should prevail

From warmth & care none should ail

 

Fear should not be a handicap

In confidence & courage let’s wrap

A manipulative mind let’s not build

Values should be constantly drilled

 

A School is a “Temple of Learning”

From vices we need to keep weaning

Transformation we need to achieve

That’s the gratification we receive.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

AGES & STAGES

 

 

You walked in with staggering gait Unsure and with a lot of fear With outstretched arms and tears You leaned towards your mom But soon from school she was gone!
Later you were happy & cheerful And had settled down with ease Being comfortable and at peace Your quiet mischief now began Restlessly here & there you ran
Then you became a wild tween Boxing, punching, pushing and pulling Provoked at the slightest pretext Pent up anger you wished to vent Unable to handle your own self
Teenage you then helplessly reached You hated when they all preached Life was lived out of Pain & pleasure Every moment you were under pressure Wanting to live life your ways.
From a caterpillar to a butterfly You just transformed your life Came back with a winning smile Recognizing you took a while Yes, my baby has grown in style!

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THE RAT TRAP

                                     

When there is a lot of invasion and ransacking by the rats, we decide that it is high time we set a trap, especially if the loss is very high, no time is wasted in trapping the rat. There is much joy in trapping it when we experience pain in the kind of damage it creates. The aroma of the burnt coconut is so inviting that the rat just runs in to eat it, and the door closes. We take it far away, to a no man’s land, and release it. This is true of our life too, when we live on our instincts, and don’t use our intelligence. When we are guided by pain and pleasure, we tend to fall into a trap of wrong company and thus, wrong habits.

 

The child does not perform well in academics and so, the parents keep scolding the child, as they are anxious about the child’s future. Listening to this every day, the child develops a dented self- image and instead of aiming to score more marks, the child joins a circle of friends who are in a similar predicament. They warmly receive him into their circle, as birds of the same feather flock together. They encourage each other for all the wrong reasons. The child is also happy in their company as they make him feel good. He doesn’t feel the need to prove himself.

 

The more and more he yields to their call, without his knowledge, he begins to lose himself. His trouble begins only once he is trapped. He is now part of a group that encourages him to smoke, to try a peg of alcohol, to take drugs, appreciates him for copying in the exam, for troubling the teacher in class, for sneaking a mobile into the school, to back answer the parent, to cheat them, and many such unacceptable behavior. It becomes a vicious cycle. He gets sucked into it.

 

The wrong company of friends is a trap in life. The sad part is, once we get into that trap, we don’t realize our folly, rather we enjoy their company. We feel good, as there is someone to appreciate everything that we do. Slowly we begin to fall in life. Just take a moment and reflect on your life. Do a self-audit. Is the curve going up or are we going down? Can you share with your parents everything that you do with these friends? Can they be introduced to your parents? If the answer is a big NO, then it is time to withdraw from the wrong company. Your achievements are more important than how you feel. These friends will disappear from your life. All that you will be left with will be, bad memories and experiences. Wake up and understand that if there is deterioration in the quality of your life, if you are not seeing any progress, it is time to come out of the wrong company that you have been keeping. Unlike the rat that cannot wriggle out of the trap, we still can, if we decide to do so. Beware and be aware of the TRAP!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

BUILDING A CULTURE

 

“A nation’s culture resides in the hearts and soul of its people”- Mahatma Gandhi

 

Many years back, when I had been to Thailand on a holiday, wherever I went for shopping, everybody welcomed me with a namaste. I was so impressed, especially because the entire country had a similar practice. It was unique to that country. Culture, is a common meeting ground for people from diverse backgrounds. Culture is inherent to a family, an organization, to society and to a country at large. This is what binds us together. This is what unifies us. This creates greater understanding in a family, synergy in a work place, and showcases the strength of an organization and the uniqueness of a country.

 

Take a family, for example. Love, mutual respect, hospitality, kindness, compassion, integrity, etc, or the lack of it, is also part of a family culture. The elders in the family, generation after generation, hand over the family culture. They are the ones who are responsible for maintaining the right culture in the family. Growing up children follow the culture. So, we have to make sure that the basic culture of the family does not disintegrate. No two families are alike. Each one is unique. A healthy family culture aids in the bringing together of all the family members, from different generations and in building fond memories. Sometimes, the negativity and wrong attitude of family heads rubs off on the younger generation. At any time if it is found that the family culture, is not good, we can still intentionally create a family culture, to offset the negative influence. Family culture can be created through values, family habits, family rituals and traditions, creating a family legacy. Building a positive culture in a family is the responsibility of the parents in a nuclear family and it has a great bearing on the children they send into the world.

 

“The family is both, the fundamental unit of society as well as the basic root of culture,”

 

It is true of any organization as well. Especially in a school, it is vital to build a great culture. If all the teachers in a school can have a similar outlook, approach, value system, discipline, attitude, and follow the code of conduct prescribed by the school, it will have a great impact on the students. It calls for a lot of self-discipline and will power to be consistent in our actions. It is a mindset though. Nothing is difficult if we set our mind on it. To create a positive climate, to be a good listener,  to get students into the habit of being regular in their work, to insist on good handwriting and neat presentation, to motivate them to set a target for the year, to strive to achieve it, to instill in them the value of honesty, to help them schedule  fixed hours of studies every day, to provide a child friendly and caring environment, to build confidence in students, to earn their trust, to be unbiased, to approach all matters professionally, to be kind to the students, yet firm in matters where we cannot allow them to have a choice, to build a beautiful rapport with the students, to ensure the physical and emotional well-being of students, to identify their strengths and work on their weaknesses, in short, mentor them, lead them by example and thereby establish a purpose and build a great school culture, which  is imminent to the healthy growth of every child. The school environment is thus created by the teachers.

 

“As teachers, we have the opportunity to foster positive changes to the every day experience in our schools. Investing time in improving school culture is worth the effort.”

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

UNPARENTING

 

The school had organized a Reach Out program for the parents of high school. Every day a message was sent in English and regional language, stressing the importance of coming on time for the meeting. On the day of the meeting, there were hardly any parents fifteen minutes before the meeting. But, by the time the meeting began, the hall was almost full. The meeting started on time, as is customary in the school. Those who came late, were accommodated in the corridor, adjacent to the auditorium.

                             “The child is the father of man.”

 Out of the many things I shared with them, the first thing I shared was, what we don’t get right in our childhood, is very difficult to learn as an adult. Some of the parents came late because they were not into the habit of being punctual. That is why the school is insisting so much on punctuality. Secondly, punctuality is not only about respecting somebody’s time, it also helps to develop a powerful mind. During their school days, when they make an effort to reach school on time, they are able to keep up their commitment as an adult too. This also helps them in other areas of their life. They become regular in completing their work, they meet deadlines with ease, they become reliable, they achieve mind over body, the world begins to trust them and, in the process, they too start believing in themselves. So, if they wish to take up a habit or drop a habit, it becomes effortless. We reach this state of effortlessness only through effort.

 

Children learn more from what they see than from what they hear. So, parents were taken through an exercise. They were asked to extend their hands and when they hear me tell 1,2,3 go, they should clap their hands. The instruction was repeated twice. They all extended their hands. Then I counted 1.2.3 and clapped my hands. All of them clapped on seeing me clap. Then I said,” go.” I asked them why they clapped before I could say, “go.” I had given clear instructions that they should clap only after I said, ‘’go.” They all laughed. I told them that children don’t want our advice. “An ounce of practice is worth tons of preaching.” So, can we model our behavior to suit the growing up child? Can our life be a scripture to our children? They don’t have to read the Gita, Koran or the Bible. They will have living role models at home. 

 

A lot of subliminal learning happens in childhood. Their environment plays a vital role in their life. So, what kind of environment are we providing them? Is home a haven of happiness, peace and love? Is there an understanding between the parents? Is there respect in the way we treat people? Are we living a systematic life? A place for everything; everything in its place. Are we living a disciplined life? A time for everything; everything on time. How we are treating our own parents, our kith and kin, is being observed by our children. When I look back I realize that I picked up a lot of my characteristics and habits from the people around me. Fortunately, I picked up the right habits. What if it is otherwise? So, we have an awesome responsibility as parents to get ourselves right if we want our children to grow up the right way. After sharing many more such insights, the meeting concluded, leaving them to reflect on what they should unlearn and relearn as a parent.

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting

WHAT IS THE REAL THREAT?

 

“A spark overlooked becomes a forest fire

                                  Every major problem that you face today

                                  Were just small issues that you overlooked yesterday.”- mahatria Ra

 

On the reopening day of the school, children in Primary classes were coming in so happily, as if, they were just waiting for this day. Almost all of them came on time and proceeded to their class. Just a few of them came in a bit late, during the five minutes grace time that we give after the reporting time. A couple of them were brought to school very late. The school insists on punctuality and so they were not allowed. As expected, one of the parents, was arguing and another was begging to be allowed inside. The school had sent messages every day before the reopening day, insisting on punctuality. Yet, they said that, being the first day, they assumed that students would be let in.

 

What they don’t learn in childhood, they will never learn in life. It is easy for the school to overlook all this and just focus on academics, but, we understand that if late coming is overlooked in their growing up years, they will struggle as an adult, to reach a place on time. They will struggle in their work place to complete their work on time. In everything, they will be late.  We find so many adults in this situation. They will become unreliable. First the world will lose faith in them, and slowly they will stop believing in themselves. It has a deep subconscious programming. What we need is a powerful mind. So, the school insists on punctuality to achieve mind over body. Only then can we become the master of our life. Time and distance is an attitude.” Attitudes don’t care where they are shaped. Once shaped, they become our behavior, either creating us or destroying us in the process.” By insisting on punctuality, we are developing in them, a powerful mind.

 

There are times when students are caught coming to school in a powered two-wheeler. They are warned. The school objects to a student riding a powered two-wheeler without a license. Students should be trained to be law abiding citizens. Just because many are using a powered two-wheeler without license, a wrong will not become right. If parents refrain from buying a powered two-wheeler for the children, however adamant they are, it will do a lot of good to the children. On the contrary, they are told to park the vehicle two streets away from the school so that they don’t get caught. Children should not be taught to ask, “Will I be caught or not?” They should actually ask themselves, “Am I right or not?” But a wrong programming happens. The mind becomes manipulative. Developing a manipulative mind in their growing up years will land them in trouble affect their life.

 

By criticizing your child’s school on the social media, you sow the seed of hatred in your child.  By talking ill about the teacher in front of the child, you are indirectly teaching the child to disrespect the teacher and to be judgmental. Children should learn to respect their teachers and take pride in the school. No matter how the child relates to the teacher or the school, neither will be affected, but it will have its own consequences in the child’s life. So, can we teach them to respect all?  These are a few of our responsibilities as parents. Can our life be the scripture for our children? To show the right direction to the child. Our children look up to us for guidance. All these may seem trivial to some, but when you evolve as a person, you understand the right way to live life. Anything that is wrong, should be avoided and anything that is right, must be embraced, early in life.

 

If you have not practiced yoga as a child, you will find it very difficult to lift your own body as an adult. Try a dhanurasana, or a  bhujangasana or adho mukha, or a janu sirasasana, and you will realize that the body you neglected in childhood is unable to become flexible as an adult. Your own body becomes a challenge to you, unlike a child, who can do all of these with ease. Similarly, what is not taught in childhood is difficult to learn as an adult. The threat then will not be from outside. The threat will be from within, if we don’t get children into the right habits. Hey parents, are you listening?

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting