BODY SHAMING

It was a quiet Sunday morning and we had some relatives over for lunch. As we were catching up after a long time, we got talking for a while. Then the conversation turned to the future plans of the young boy of the family. The mother was constantly talking about his obesity. The entire time she was making fun of him, even while having our lunch. The boy did not look hurt, probably because he knows that his mother always talks like that, or because he is familiar with all of us. Even if he felt bad, it was not visible on his face. But every time she made fun of him, I felt bad. My husband was constantly sharing with him tips on losing weight the healthy way, what worked for him and what did not. How he lost eleven kilos by walking every day at least ten thousand steps or more, spread out during the day, and the discipline he brought into his eating habits.  My husband felt that we should help him to lose weight. We should show him a way out and not keep commenting on him.

 This is something all of us as parents should do. If our children are struggling to study and their grades are not good, we should help them out, rather than compare them with their siblings. Just asking them to study all the time will not solve the issue. We need to go to the root of the problem and then work on it. Let’s not comment on their looks either. Every child is unique. Any limitation in them should be seen in the right perspective and not be judged upon. Every time we pass comments on our children’s inadequacies (we assume it to be so), we dent their self-image. They start feeling inferior to others and lose their self-worth. The environment we provide them at home during childhood is crucial. A lot of effort needs to be taken in this direction.

 As parents, should we not build their self-confidence? A behavior recognized and rewarded will be repeated. We only need to keep appreciating them whenever they are right and underplay their mistakes. The world outside will not help our children in any way. We are the only ones who can build a future for them. Home should not be a place of humiliation. Talking ill about them in the presence of others reveals a lot about us than the child. Our children should blossom in their growing up years and not wither away. This is a decision I made when I became a mother, and I am glad that I did it. Welcome to the club!

#Thoughtfulthursdays #nsn #nsnschool #mentoring #parenting